"jangan melihat ke atas, dengan itu kamu akan merasa sedih akan kekurangan diri.
lihatlah ke bawah, dengan itu kamu akan bersyukur dengan apa yang kamu ada"

tiba tiba teringat quotes tu. i think its time for me to stop grieving and crying.
sakit itu kan penghapus dosa. i might have a whole bundle of sins that somehow Allah gave me this sickness and pain for me to realize all the wrongdoings that i've done. kalau dibandingkan sakit mangsa gempa bumi di yogyakarta, mine is nothing. semoga mereka dilindungi. i wish i were there to help. i really am. my sincere condolences to them, may Allah bless them all. to my friends kt sana, take care of yourself.

grow up fathiah.

and the pain is still the king. );

ya Allah, kurangkanlah sakitku ini.

Much silence and a good disposition, there are no two things better than these." (Bukhari)

when i do less talk, doesn't mean that i'm not in the good mood or such. not even if i don't want to be disturb. not even that i don't like anyone or someone else. its just because i think being a silencer is the best way. my words won't hurt others, and even my actions wouldn't harm others. this time being, i think i might enjoyed by not being in a group, i would pretty much help in fixing myself, being alone. i have my social life, but sometimes i'm just need time to held in my strength and build up my motivations.(which is nowhere to be find by now). i'm not as prefect as others, i'm not even close, but i'm trying to be like one. i have my own secrets, my own sickness, my own pain, that somehow i think it shouldn't be bragly shown to others. let me bear the pain myself. inshaAllah He will help me. i do believe that things happened for reasons. He wouldn't tested His servant beyond her acquaintance. afterall, He is The Almighty and The Merciful.




**saya senyap bukan kerana benci,bukan kerana sakit hati, but i'm bearing a huge pain and sickness. saya tak berniat untuk mengeluh tapi saya juga bukan berniat untuk menunjuk-nunjuk. i hope this will clarify everything. take care loves. (:

"And if Allah touches you with hurt, there is none who can remove it but He; and if He intends any good for you, there is none who can keep back His favour; He brings it to whom He pleases of His servants; And He is the Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." [10:107]

a friend told me, "APPRECIATE ONLY THOSE WHO APPRECIATE YOU. BY DOING THAT, YOU WILL NOT BE HURT". somehow, i think it is true. );

Dari Abdullah r.a katanya : “Aku datang mengunjungi Rasulullah s.a.w ketika beliau sakit, lalu kusentuh baginda seraya berkata “Ya, Rasulullah ! Demammu bertambah teruk.” Jawab baginda “Memang demamku sama dengan dua orang kamu.” Kataku pula, “Semoga anda mendapat pahala berganda pula.” Jawab baginda : “Semoga!” Kemudian sabda baginda pula : “Tidak ada seorang muslim yang ditimpa cubaan berupa sakit dan sebagainya melainkan dihapuskan Allah taala dosa-dosanya seperti pohon kayu menggugurkan daunnya.”

I MISS THE HEALTHY ME.
I MISS THE HAPPY ME.
I MISS MY WONDERFUL LIFE.
I MISS MY HAPPINESS IN MMU.
I MISS EVERYTHING THAT I USED TO BE.

i might stand out as strong, brave, calm and happy girl.
but the truth is, i am not.
sometimes, i want to shut the whole world up and just listen to what my heart says.
i want to be just with my family who wouldn't hurt me and give me a peace of mind.
i'm just too tired of taking care of others. i'm repeating this over and over again, i know.
but in the end, the talk is just the talk.
no action. period.




but i've come to realized that i'm not in the position to claim whatever i have, or i had.
Allah is Almighty.
He knows the best and He give the best.
things that i might not know the beautiful of behind, He knows.
He gave me so much, yet i'm still mumbling about everything.
life.
is all about karma.
what goes around, comes around.
mark my words.
i'm not hoping that you will get the punishment, never!
i'm just hoping that one day, you will realized that you shouldn't have do what you've done.

right people.
i have love. in fact, its LOVES.
so many that every night i keep smiling.
so many that i can laugh after i cried.
so many that i know they will be always by my side.
i'm grateful for that.
thank you Allah. (:

sakit. yang hanya Tuhan saja yang tahu.

absolutely true.

we all has had something that worries our fragile mind.
its good to know someone is there for us.

|Hasyimah Mahayidin.

Disaat kita selalu ditimpa hujan, kita mengeluh bertanya dimana matahari.
Rupa-rupanya saat hujan berhenti, kita diberi pelangi.
Begitu juga, kadang-kala kita bertanya kenapa kita selalu dibebani masalah.
Namun kita lupa, itu tandanya Allah sayangkan kita.
Dia yakin untuk menurunkan dugaan buat kita.

Segala yang terjadi itu, pasti ada baik dan buruknya.
Yang pasti, baik itu datangnya dari Ilahi, dan buruk itu datang dari kelemahan hamba itu sendiri.
Wallahuaalam. (:

omg. this is soo troublesome.
a real trouble.
cuak.cuak.cuak.
semoga dipermudahkanNya.

oh dear.

.nadia nasha.
.farhana norazman.nakiah abdullah.amalia zawawi.idzni dalila.hidayah fauzi.
.hasnun hanafi.sharifah khadijah.hasyimah mahayidin.amira roslan.
.siti norhidayu.jacqueline grace.shafiqa.ibun zaini.azwani yusof.irmellia.ain.nurul anfal.nurul azmina.
.izni adnan.zainab syed hassan.ros syukriah.nurunnisa idayu.nurul akmal.hidayah ghani.hajar aishah.

because you girls meant the world to me. (;
ily.

i couldn't stand, walk or even talk. the pain is literally twisting my mind. i don't need a painkiller. it won't do a thing. i need an antidote. for this. GOODNIGHT people.

airmata, i would be happy if you just get off and say bye for now. i'm just too tired to keep you rolling on. i won't bite you, but please come visit me later. enough is enough. get a rest, a nice deep rest. yes?

kuatkanlah hati ini ya Allah. );

Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.
Oprah Winfrey

Allhamdulillah, itulah kata orang kalau nak tgk betapa sayangnya orang kepada kita, lihat sahaja reaksinya ketika kita susah. Allhamdulillah ya Allah, for granted me whole lot of friends and sisters who guided and calmed me through my solemness. How wonderful You've created them, how wonderful they are to me, is totally out of range. No word can explain that. Terima kaseh is not enough, its beyond terima kaseh for all your kindness. I won't be shy to say i love you all with all my heart. Semuga Allah membahagiakan kalian semua. Ameen. I'm going to sleep now, hoping that tomorrow is a blossom day, tomorrow is going to be a great day, at least better than today. InshaAllah. (;

loves from heart, fathiahathirah.

Allah s.w.t tidak akan menimpakan sesuatu ujian diluar kemampuan hambaNya. InshaAllah. (;

Anak Adam yang bernama Nurul Fathiah Athirah Hassan,
Sesungguhnya Allah sedang menguji kamu,
Allah sedang berbicara kepadamu tentang kebenaran dan kebatilan,
Allah sedang memaklumkan kamu akan apa yang tidak kamu ketahui,
Allah sedang menguji kamu.
Oleh itu, bersabarlah wahai hati yang diuji.

i hate the fact that i valued people who tremendously hurt me day by day. i'm the one who keep on apologizing. am i truly is that rubbish to you? yes, i am not in a position of claiming myself as a prefect person. but indeed, i'm trying to be like one. they said you can find a friend in a minute. but for me, to find a truly friend, a friend who can accept you just the way you are might take ages to find. i am deeply hurt. i've been crying the whole evening thinking what else should i do. i hate the fact that i am the only one that being nice to myself. i hate the fact that i still love you, my friend. how i wish all this is just a dream, so when i woke up tomorrow, everything is going back to normal. but everyone knows, this isn't a dream, isn't a fantasy. i'm so tired taking care of others hearts. please take care of mine as well. just a bit of love and honesty will cure the wound. please. it won't cost you a penny. i'm not asking, i'm begging you. PLEASE.

“Tidaklah seorang muslim tertimpa derita dari penyakit atau perkara lain kecuali Allah hapuskan dengannya (dari sakit tersebut) kejelekan-kejelekannya (dosa-dosanya) sebagaimana pohon menggugurkan daunnya.”

(Diriwayatkan oleh Imam Muslim)

ya Allah, kuatkanlah semangatku dan kesabaranku. jadikan dugaan mu ini penghapus dosa-dosaku.

I'm thanking Allah for giving me faith and iman.
I'm thanking Allah for giving me my wonderful parents.
I'm thanking Allah for giving me my hilarious siblings.
I'm thanking Allah for giving me my soul sisters.
I'm thanking Allah for giving me my precious friends.
I'm thanking Allah for giving me my chances to love.
I'm thanking Allah for giving me my chances to be loved.
I'm thanking Allah for giving me everything.

I've come to realize that I've thousands of reasons why should I be thanking and grateful to Him.

(;

It is very easy to stop short of understanding love. The idea of pure, real love, is so alien to our experiences, so foreign to the world we live in, we subconsciously, and even consciously, reject it as a non-existent fantasy. Yet it does exist. Because we seldom, if ever, witness such love does not mean it is less than real. Because the experiences of our past and the realities of our daily existence attack love does not mean it is a fantasy. Our doubts and fears, desires and temptations, weaknesses and longing to 'live', cannot change the fact that pure, true, real, love exists, and that people can love one another.

I THINK I HATE YOU. I THINK I REALLY DO.

terima kaseh!

a night. full of loves. i think i might noted tonight as the best night in my life. err, so far.

i have problems with people who have the special intention on analyzing people by his/her outer look. i mean, how often have we heard the quote, never judge a book by its cover?. seriously, can you tell if the man is good or bad by looking at the face? i am standing in position wheres i wouldnt even want to make a guess. who am i to judge anyone anyway? and yet more often than not, some people tend to take pleasure and jump in quickly to judge the person or the situation. i just... cant get it? how easy it is to set up your mind, just-like-that? ive been talking about this matter over and over again, because i do have special issues on it. i really cant give any example for it as it might be got something to do with someone else out there. i guess it is only human nature and it takes years to change it, to practice, to learn before one can realize and see things in right manner.

one last thing, see with your heart, not just your eyes, and be amazed at the wonderful people who come into your life.

(;

sweettt. (;

you look pretty much beautiful when you shut your mouth up.

such a kind way to bicker on you? i guess.

it is for real.

sakit hati.
pilu.
sedih.
terasa hati.
kurang sabar.
terkilan.

);
);
);

YET. ANOTHER POST.

TO MY DEAR ZAINAB SYED HASSAN.
IM SORRY THAT IVE LET THOSE TALKS REMAINED AS TALKS.
JUST TALKS.
PERIOD.
SORY SBB BUAT AWAK KECIK ATI.
BUT I PROMISED YOU ONE THING, NANTI KITA PEGI.
SERIOUSLY.
GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT,KAN?
PEGI SHOOTING OUTING MAKAN.
OKAY?
PLEASE DONT BE MAD AT ME.
I LOVE YOU!

haih.
another tiring day.
thank you doctor sbb amek darah saya.
simpanlah buat pusaka nenek moyang. gggrr.

almost accident 3 kali ye. saya ulang, 3kali!
you really shouldn't drink and drive.
err, i mean, you shouldn't drive after you took medicines.
bermerbahaya okay!
mark my words. ;p

yang mesra itu tidak semestinya mencintai.
yang mencintai itu tidak semestinya memiliki.
yang memiliki itu tidak semestinya menakluki.


get it? (;

I was so far from you
Yet to me you were always so close
I wandered lost in the dark
I closed my eyes toward the signs
You put in my way
I walked everyday
Further and further away from you
Ooooo Allah, you brought me home
I thank You with every breath I take.

Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah.

I never thought about
All the things you have given to me
I never thanked you once
I was too proud to see the truth
And prostrate to you
Until I took the first step
And that’s when you opened the doors for me
Now Allah, I realized what I was missing
By being far from you.

Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah.

Allah, I wanna thank You
I wanna thank you for all the things that you’ve done
You’ve done for me through all my years I’ve been lost
You guided me from all the ways that were wrong
And did you give me hope

O Allah, I wanna thank you
I wanna thank You for all the things that you’ve done
You’ve done for me through all my years I’ve been lost
You guided me from all the ways that were wrong
I wanna thank You for bringing me home

Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah
Alhamdulillah, Elhamdulillah
All praises to Allah, All praises to Allah.

officially deactivated my facebook acc. sigh.

bergantung nyawa pada itu phone, itu ym, itu skype, itu tumblr, itu formspring, ini blog.
(woah baru perasan banyak jugek ye?)
hahaa. x)

selamat maju jaya tuk adik tersayang, mohamad irsyad fahmi. he is sitting for pmr this year, currently this week. :D all the best wishes, make us proud of you!

much love, (;

I THINK IM GONNA PUT MY FB ACC OFF FOR A LONG TIME.FOR THOSE WHO READ THIS, GET ME THROUGH THE YM AND SKYPE, YES? I CANT HELP BEING SURROUNDED WITH WEIRDEST STALKERS EVER. I'VE PUT EVERYTHING IN PRIVATE BUT STILL.grrrrr. TOLONGLAH FACEBOOK BUKAN TEMPAT NAK MENGGATAL TAK TENTU PSL. SORRY IF I GET TOO HARSH, TIRED OF BEING NICE ALL OF TIME.BYEE.

Apa Bahagian Tubuh Paling Bererti?

iluvislam.com

Ibuku selalu bertanya padaku apa bahagian tubuh yang paling penting.

Bertahun-tahun, aku selalu meneka dengan jawapan yang aku anggap benar.

Ketika aku muda, aku fikir suara adalah yang paling penting bagi kita sebagai manusia, jadi aku jawab, "Telinga, Bu."

Jawab Ibuku, "Bukan. Ramai orang yang tuli. Tapi, teruslah memikirkannya dan aku menanyakanmu lagi nanti."

Selang beberapa tahun kemudian, dia bertanya padaku lagi. Sejak jawapan pertama, kini aku yakin jawapan kali ini pasti benar.

Jadi, kali ini aku mengatakan, "Bu, penglihatan sangat penting bagi semua orang, jadi pastilah mata kita."

Dia memandangku dan berkata, "Kamu belajar dengan cepat, tapi jawapanmu masih salah kerana ramai orang yang buta."

Gagal lagi, aku meneruskan usahaku mencari jawapan baru dan dari tahun ke tahun, Ibu terus bertanya padaku beberapa kali dan jawapannya selalu, "Bukan. Tapi, kamu semakin pandai dari tahun ke tahun, anakku."

Akhirnya tahun lalu, datokku meninggal. Semua keluarga bersedih. Semua menangis.

Bahkan, ayahku menangis. Aku mengingatinya kerana itulah saat kedua kalinya aku melihatnya menangis.

Ibuku memandangku ketika tiba giliranku untuk mengucapkan selamat tinggal pada datok.

Dia bertanya padaku, "Apakah kamu sudah tahu apa bahagian tubuh yang paling penting, sayang?"

Aku terkejut ketika Ibu bertanya pada saat seperti ini. Aku sering berfikir, ini hanyalah permainan antara Ibu dan aku.

Ibu melihat tanda kebingungan diraut wajahku dan memberitahu, "Pertanyaan ini penting. Ini akan menunjukkan padamu apakah kamu sudah benar-benar "hidup".

Untuk semua bahagian tubuh yang kamu beritahu padaku dulu, aku selalu berkata kamu salah dan aku telah memberitahu kamu kenapa.

Tapi, hari ini adalah hari di mana kamu harus belajar pelajaran yang sangat penting."

Dia memandangku dengan wajah keibuan. Aku melihat matanya penuh dengan airmata.

Dia berkata, "Sayangku, bahagian tubuh yang paling penting adalah bahumu."

Aku bertanya, "Apakah kerana fungsinya untuk menahan kepala?"

Ibu membalas, "Bukan, tapi kerana bahu dapat menahan kepala seorang teman atau orang yang kamu sayangi ketika mereka menangis.

Kadang-kadang dalam hidup ini, semua orang perlu bahu untuk menangis.

Aku cuma berharap, kamu punya cukup kasih sayang dan teman-teman agar kamu selalu mempunyai bahu untuk menangis bila- bila pun kamu memerlukannya."

Akhirnya, aku tahu, bahagian tubuh yang paling penting adalah tidak menjadi orang yang mementingkan diri sendiri.

Tetapi, simpati terhadap penderitaan yang dialami oleh orang lain.

Orang akan melupakan apa yang kamu katakan.

Orang akan melupakan apa yang kamu lakukan.

Tetapi, orang tidak akan pernah lupa bagaimana kamu membuat mereka bererti.

Just because the past is painful, Doesn't mean the future will be. So never let events from the past,

Change the events for future, or You will be miserable forever…

*thanks to akmalsyahmi for this vid. i like this song too. :D
and, stay strong babe! (:

fairytale does exist, right people?