Regret, repent, relief. Allah is the Most Forgiving indeed. Use your mistakes as a gateway to get closer to Him, rather than away from Him. Turn to Him again and again and never give up hope because if Allah wills something, regardless of how impossible it may be, it’ll happen. :)

I discovered this from my beloved kakak, Siti Sarah. Very meaningful indeed.

And as for me, throughout my life I've been a Muslim. In fact, I was born a Muslim. But only recently have I discovered the beauty of Islam and I'm trying to be a good Mukmin, not merely just a Muslim. InshaAllah. :)

Aaah yes. I've made up my mind before. To do not trust anyone. To do not trust people anymore. I used to believe whatever they are saying, whatever their views are. Aaah yes, I am that cruel woman. Whom ignored the sincerity just for the reason that people keep on hurting me. And yes, I don't have any reason to just believe a stranger who trying very hard to be my beloved, and then flee away. And never came back. Period.

But somehow, there is someone. Who came by and just do the listening part. Listen to my stories and bebbling. The one who I never thought would be my closest ever. She accompanied me. She the one who feel the pain out of my wound. Alahai. I really love her more than what she could imagine. Just for the fact that we are being so comfortable with each other, we can tease each other, without any butthurt and such. She is really a sister, my counsellor, my teacher and indeed my best friend. Thank you for everything. So much. I love you, Nur Hidayah Ghani. So much.

The cruelest thing you can do to a person, is pretend they mean more to you than they actually do.

Hati I rasa sakit sangat. Bukan rasa sakit sebab benci atau dendam, tp sakit sedih. I teringat kenangan semalam yang sepatutnya dah lama I buang jauh jauh. T p I still ingat. Tak senang nak lupa memori. Selagi I masih ingat benda tu, selagi tu memori tu wujud. I taktahu sejak bila I jadi kuat tahan semua benda yang menimpa. I taktahu sejak bila air mata I jadi kering. I pon taktahu kenapa senang sangat tembok yang I bina, kekuatan yang I dapat tu musnah macam tu je. I rapuh. Sangat. I menangis tiap masa. I tak mengeluh tp I teringat balik, betapa bodohnya diri I dulu. I gagah sangat nasihat orang pung pang pung pang, tp I sendiri terjatuh. I tak kisah kalau jatuh longkang, sbb I tau I masih boleh bangun dan panjat keluar. Tp I jatuh gaung, gaung yang I sendiri taktahu dalamnya, yang I sendiri taktahu apa yang ada tunggu I kat bawah sana.

Tp I rasa itu adalah life lesson yang paling berharga pernah I dapat. I belajar macam mana nak lepaskan benda yang kita saying, I belajar untuk lebih hargai orang, yang penting, I belajar untuk jadi seorang yang I sendiri pon I taktahu I boleh jadi.

Gaung yang I jatuh tu, dalam. Sakit sangat. Tp I tak mati. Allah selamatkan i. dia beri I ubat yang paling berkesan yang paling mujarab, kesabaran.

RAMADHAN KAREEM!

Assalamualaikum. It's been a while since I update this blog kan? Alhamdulillah. We are giving much opportunity by Him to perform my favourite month of all, Ramadhan. It's a holy month, for us to tarbiyah and educate our ownself. To be a grown-up, to be a mukmin, to be someone better than we were. I believe He is giving me this opportunity for me to change myself, to reflect myself of all my worngdoings during the past. I've forgot much about the grudges, about the past that hurt, about the people whom abandoned me, used me and such. Alhamdulillah, I think He helps me along to clean all those sins. Afterall, all the good things come from Him, and the bad things, come from my own khilaf. I'm giving Him all the rights to settle my dunia's matters. I'm not a good person. And I'm trying to change that, InshaAllah. Semoga Allah sentiasa ada bersama kita. Allahuakbar!